My client Marta had a hysterectomy last week on May 25 and I had mine 2 years ago on May 24. So interesting how the timing of things happen sometimes. We had a wonderful conversation this afternoon as she’s on this healing journey now. I’m just so happy that I have my new website finally up and how it has become my platform of expression for what is most important to me. It’s so easy to stay silent and not share our stories in fear of making someone else uncomfortable or that they might not agree with you. But my therapist once said to me to look at it like this, “This is what I have to offer, you can take it or leave it, but do know that lots and lots of people will take it and have a more beautiful life as a result.” So that’s been my motto since having this new website up and having it be so much more personal that my previous websites. Also this was my first week of yoga therapy school and lets just say I am inspired to be who I’ve always wanted to be, an advocate of change. Now I can’t even imagine not writing on here for just one day even. So much I’ve wanted to share for so many years and I guess the time as come that my heart says a big yes. So Marta and I shared so many things this afternoon on how we feel we can help the world better understand this hysterectomy journey. She is 36 years old and I was 43 years old. It’s young for both of us we’ve been told but what does that mean exactly and how is that suppose to make us or others around us feel. This is the mystery of many things that I write about, these things that no one wants to talk about or doesn’t know how to talk about. We both suffered from very painful moon cycles as well as lots of discomfort for much of each month especially the years (yes years) leading up to our surgeries. This is a discomfort and pain that many many women carry on their own. It’s not something easily talked about among families or friends. Marta said she told her friends she was having the hysterectomy and they didn’t know what to say or how they might support her. We talked together today about how we felt we made them feel uncomfortable when we brought it up, even if it wasn’t our intent, so what are we to do about that? How do we bring something like this more into the open so we all can receive the love and support that is so needed at that time. Due to my many past experiences of trauma, I have really learned how to ask for help and how to receive help. It didn’t use to be that way at all, I thought I had to do it all by myself because that would mean I was strong and not weak. What a f***ing joke that many of us were fed in childhood often as we watched the adults around us try to do it all by themselves and that didn’t work out so well for most of them. I wouldn’t actually physically be sitting here if I didn’t ask for help during my severe depression in 2011. There also can come these layers of shame, usually also embedded from childhood experiences as we watched adults shame themselves and then pour that shame on us unintentionally. Why do I need a hysterectomy this young, what is wrong with my body, who can support me through this emotionally and mentally? Why have I been sick every month for so many years with my moon cycle? Why does no one want to talk about their moon cycles in general? Could there by any connections to the way I am living my life that my sacred body has had to take on on these years and she is finally saying, enough is enough. Marta and I shared about how many other things going on in our lives affect our health greatly and they eventually manifest into dis-ease in our bodies. And this presents for each person differently so it’s hard to make the connections sometimes. When I sat with my doctor discussing my hysterectomy, I asked is there any support for me right now as I have to make this big decision. In yoga therapy we have lengthy discussions about the layers of our divine bodies. They being physical, breathing, emotions, feelings, thoughts, beliefs and what brings you joy and peace. Most often western medicine is really only taught about the physical piece which is clearly very very important but what about the others. I loved my surgeon as he was open to me being a yoga therapist and all my crazy questions right from the beginning. He listened and listened to me and answered all my questions and more. And he honored my art therapy when I brought it in to show him as it was a big part of my healing preparation for this surgery. So when I asked about any support that might be out there for me, he wondered if that’s something I was interested in starting at the hospital. And here I am starting that process.